Truth Hurts

I was taught early to depend on myself due to lack of support from the ones that I thought would give their last breath- never the one to be coddled or even spooned- I guess from day one I had a mission soon as I came out the womb- sitting back in awe and disbelief sometimes I can’t believe that this is the person who raised me?- grades remained passing, but my focus was on something bigger- always been the black sheep, the outcast, the one that seem to be different- I marched to my own beat-  so the attention for negativity was always on me- the scapegoat of the family, but hey somebody got to play that role- but things got heated when I decided to switch my goals- in the path to find me I lost them- can’t say I’m mad just disappointed that you still can’t see your own bullshit- but I digress certain things are no longer for me-like kissing the ass of someone who can’t contribute positivity or anything to me- I’ll let you all have that and  you can remain asleep as the world and myself grows bigger- because I’m on a quest to better myself, my family and find me- I may step on some toes and I may even hurt a few souls, but being dishonest isn’t in me- so as soon as you wake up then maybe you should reach out to me- maybe you should find yourself, your backbone, or even your dignity and then find me- the wave length and the path that we are on does not seem to be connecting- is it because I have grown and you all have remained stagnant? – or is it that you are ok with being known as a has been?- once you remove your head from the ass that keeps you- then you can see why your flesh and blood keeps her distance from you- no grudge not even a tear to shed but that book you clutch so tight- go back and read the story of Cain and Abel and then you will see why in your family there lies so much pain and strife- you can’t preach the word without being willing to be taught- so in this message I will leave you with my final thought- in my eyes you are a hypocrite and very contradictory by nature- just sad to say that you can’t see after a man gets to know you he no longer wants to save you- that trait you have passed down to your very first seed- now I will sit back and watch her children destroy her just as you have done your seeds………

Brittany “BossLady” Johnson

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Non-Delusional

now this may step on a few toes but as you continue to read you will see I wouldn’t care if I stepped on yours, his, or her toes – growing up being brainwashed thinking that the church building was going to save me – now as I am getting older I realize that a God has always lived inside of me – deep roots is what made me – but as a child I let society raise me – now as I’m on this path of self knowledge I now realize that I’m going to be saved regardless- not because somebody told me I would be, but because I’m on a path of self knowledge and my history is now clear to me – them white folks tricked us and made negroes believe in Christianity- but who did we pray to before they gave us that white man on a cross with a perm swearing he would save folks that looked like you and me? – Have you ever looked at the first set of Bibles? -Did you ever wonder what that symbol stood for? -but us being niggas we just took it and ran with it not ever second guessing or questioning what it stood for – you want to fool a nigga keep info in a book- white supremacist got our minds so messed up they got us thinking its us who’s the crook!- they stole our land, our freedom, our families, but we keep running to a building in hopes of salvation- nigga please you better believe in a higher power and begin meditating! – the same white man that’s on the cross can’t save you or me you want to know why? – well its because that ain’t even Jesus its Cesare Borgia the gay lover of Leonardo da Vinci – now you tell me how this man is supposed to save you or me?- he needed to save his damn self but us black folks never want to really know the truth – we would rather get all dressed up and listen to someone who just robbed you! – Church is a business and its ran good- you ever notice that its so many churches right beside each gun and liquor store in every BLACK neighborhood? – yeah get saved then when you leave go get drunk and kill each other, but you can run to the church and still be covered! – So now when they ask what religion I am I say I’m Non-Delusional!- research who we really are and you will see our history didn’t start on a plantation, but that’s what they want us to believe- Look I can only do and say so much its up to you to do as I have done and am doing and that’s to read- or you can continue being a certified negro under warranty until the day you leave!

Brittany “Boss Lady” Johnson

Side Effects of a Man

she watches you as you sleep – in love with you so deeply-  she gets you ready for work – and even greets you when you get off with a smile knowing deep down her heart hurts – she closes her eyes as you kiss her good bye- but as soon as you turn to leave tears fill her eyes – she’s in love with you so deeply – that she believes every lie you tell her knowing that with another woman you have been sleeping – her heart hurts and her eyes filled with hope – she believes in this love and pretends that nothing is ever wrong but she wants to cry out to you and ask why are you doing her so wrong- why lead me on and tell me you want this family to work – when deep down you have done so much to her its hard for her to believe that anything will ever work – but yet she still believes in this love – you all created life and brought it into this world – she looks at you and then looks at your babygirl – she believes the lie because in her life she only pictured you – no other man touches her the way you do – no other man makes her feel the way you do – and no other kiss makes her feel the way she feels about you – through every trial and tribulation she has been there- so in her mind when you make another woman feel good- she dies a little inside and when you leave she screams this isn’t fair- she knows she can do better and there are other men out there- but her heart wants you and that’s something she just can’t  share- her heart is pure and loyal and wants you to see her for who she is- she is your backbone, your wife, and the mother of your kids- with each chance she has given you, you say you will do right-  but those promises change when you come home after midnight – pretending she doesn’t know- she just ask how was your day and swallows her tears as he explains how his day goes – her pride, confidence, and self esteem all gone but through it all she holds her head high- praying that one day he will stop to see her heart before it passes by- feeling as though she will never be enough for this man she loves so deep -she sits in silence and thinks about the good times and begins to weep – will they ever get those back? – has he gotten comfortable with hurting her? – these are all questions that tend to bother her – when she leaves he says come closer – but when she stays he loves her no longer – confused and ashamed that a man has made her feel this way – she could no longer take living and ended it on his birthday – a message to her kids was written and said- never live your life for anyone else live your life for you instead…………………..

 

Brittany ” BossLady” Johnson

 

The Truth… Part 1

As I’ve stated before I don’t write about puppies, clouds, or rainbows so my thought process may offend you, but truth be told somebody got to say it so if this isn’t the type of truth you want then I’m not the person for you- Our worlds may cross, but our paths will remain different because for the simple minded I can no longer make time for you-  material things, bags, shoes, and acceptance that’s that shit that appeases you, but knowing the truth about who I am and where I come from you see that’s that shit that leaves niggas like you confused! – knowing that their is a hidden agenda to kill off niggas like you- while they may smile in your face they are plotting on ways to kill and remove organs from people who look like you- organ trade is just like the slave trade just now they dress it up and use mainstream media to confuse niggas like you- they sale your information in the prison systems after they have received DNA samples from people who look like me and you! – you think your healthcare provider really gives a damn about you?-  nah they can’t wait to see organ donor on your license so they can plot a way to destroy you- black blood has always reigned supreme why do you think they made us believe in their God during slavery? – if you really read the Bible it states God had hair of wool and feet of clay and his skin was bronze -so you tell me what white man looks this way- they don’t want to tell you that some of those stories were taken from ancient Egyptian tombs, but they use some of own words in a building called church just so they can pay a bill, but tell you if you pay the gates you will make it through!- hate to burst your bubble but God lives within you! – its when you reach your highest power and giving becomes 2nd nature to you!-  yet again they list names of cities and countries in the Bible and get you to believe that this white man died for your sins but Egypt is in Africa and its hot as hell so there is no way a white dude could’ve truly died for you! – is there a higher power? – is there a God? – yes the answers to these 2 questions still remain true, but if you read a book and look up who we really are its there plain as day during slavery we were killed if we thought this way- secret societies, illuminati, racism do you really think they don’t exist? – if you think I’m lying then answer this question for me why did they kill Sean, Tamir, Koryn, Trayvon, Mike, Alton, or Philando  and then turn around and blame them for the bullshit? Black Lives Matter yeah until we start to read- I could go on all day but I got a black husband and black kids that need this knowledge from me- I can continue to school you, but to some its just a waste of time for me- you will forever be lost, but don’t worry whenever you do wake up- there is a spot for you beside me!

Brittany ” BossLady” Johnson

sssssshhhhhhhhhh………… Part 2

you see as I dig further into knowing myself- I see there are some things that were covered up so I couldn’t truly learn what type of person I myself was dealing with- this God that they put out for us to bow down to is nothing more than a homosexual clown who decided not only men but his sister he would screw- but you want me to bow down and kiss this white man’s feet- excuse my language but I be damned if I bow down to anything or anybody who look like folks who have and still are trying to enslave me- truth be told this God that you speak so highly of is a mere figment because before HIS story there was a story that was told millions of years ago- that man looked just like me and HE is who I bow down to at night in search of HIM to rescue me- nobody wants to be honest and real about our history- lets keep living our lives with shades on so nobody can know that we know our true history- the fact of the matter is you beat us, raped us, chained us and forced this religion on me and if I worshipped an Afrikan God you would kill me! – White Supremacy at its best but thank God since Elementary school I’ve kept who I truly was close to my chest- why is Brittany so quiet and why is she to herself? -because I can’t waste my time on the shallow minded while I’m in search for self-  The Klan no longer wear white sheets they were blue with a badge and kill black folks then scream, “I was afraid for my life that nigga was gonna kill me!”- maybe I shouldn’t discuss what it is I know because if I read books and discover this cover up which way will their guns blow?- should I remain in silence and teach my kids this bullshit history or die with a purpose so they won’t be ashamed of their identity? – win or lose, right or wrong, I will never believe what my teachers explained to me because while niggas is out here celebrating the 4th of July I’m looking up Juneteenth- 1776 we were still in the field but you niggas running round here with red, white, and blue on like a loose chicken on top of a hill – why did MLK die, why did Malcolm die, Medgar Evers, the list goes on and on- they can try to burn our books, but once we all wake up then freedom forreal will really be our song! – you still keep waiting for reparations- truth be told they know they owe us but choose to continue to enslave us- the cure for AIDS was on its way to the states but the African doctor who made it -his body was later on misplaced- the money is in the medicine not the cure- you think in this lifetime you will ever see that cure?- look I don’t mean to be longwinded but this is something I had to get off my chest- either we wake up and stop killing each other or be prepared to get your children a bullet proof vest………..

 

Brittany “BossLady” Johnson

What If?

a broken heart and unfulfilled promises – love hurts is what old folks say – but how much hurt can you endure before you make up your mind whether to go or to stay? – they say love conquers all and that it takes time and if its real let it go and see if it comes back – but what happens if you’re scared to let it go in fear that you’ll never get the one that you loved the most back? – is that confirmation that it was never real in the first place? – Sometimes you have to make decisions that hurt for the moment so that in the long run you have a smile on your face – give it your all is what they say – what if you have and you feel as though you have nothing left to give? – what if you feel like all you have to show for are beautiful kids? – what if you keep praying and asking God to reveal what their purpose is in your life and all you get back is a handful of tears, pain, and strife? – what if you see the potential, but its not up to you they have to see if for themselves? – you can want something for someone so bad, but its up to them to want it as bad as you do- what if you see the effort to try, but its just not enough anymore for you? – what if even on your worse day you just can’t give up? – what if you love so hard and never want to give up? – what if is the question – and there are so many questions that can follow, but what if when you close your eyes they are gone tomorrow? – what if your heat beats so bad for one person, but they still can’t see how hard you fight for them to better themselves? – I know it takes 2 to fight, but what if you lose their touch and can’t be next to them at night? – they say love is the strongest drug due to it being an addiction all of its own – what if they know how much you love them and although make bad decisions just can’t leave you alone? – what if a broken heart was easy to fix? – I know they say don’t let the one that broke your heart try to repair it to begin with – I can go on and on and ask what if the sky was pink instead of blue – I could run circles in my mind about you losing me or me losing you, but what if just for a little while longer I overlook my flaws and yours and we continue to try so we can save my heart and yours………………………………………………………………..

 

Brittany “BossLady” Johnson

Sweep Around Your Own Front Porch

it’s funny how they can point out the flaws in your home – but can’t seem to see that the issue lies where they call home – and need to pay attention as to why their man has an eye  and other body parts that tend to roam – so caught up in the hype of life – not realizing that its the one in their household put something to their back called a knife – I use to get upset and try to get folks to see the bigger picture, but then I had to realize that my life has a paintbrush and I can just edit you out of this picture – your trouble don’t start with those inside of your household it starts with those that are unhappy in their own – so focused on what the next person is doing or wearing – but through that false concern I see the burden that you are truly wearing – you are an insecure, scared, feeble minded fool with the depth that reaches no further than 3 feet in a kiddie pool – now you see I can kill you with words, but I choose not too – I decided to sit back and watch how Karma continuously tries to humble you – you see worrying about somebody who isn’t thinking about you – only hurts your soul because that person has moved on completely and its without you – before you go judging the next person from their house to their spouse – make sure you cross all your T’s and dot all your I’s – because the one that you think is closes to you is the main one who has the most to say about you – the one who you give your all to – is the main one who tries to destroy you – take this broom that I have to give and live your life and stop worrying about how somebody else lives – if they don’t reach out to you during trying times and seem to be fine without you – then maybe just maybe that person has learned to love you from a distance, but no longer wants you to be apart of their life – take the hint and check yourself because words may not hurt but they sure do stick – and once you have crossed that line of disrespect -truth be told there is no coming back ! – there is no expiration date on disrespect – so do yourself a favor and live your life to the fullest because the person or people that you are on a mission to tear down – watch you die slowly on the inside because they no longer want you around!

 

Brittany ” BossLady ” Johnson

sssssshhhhhhhhhh…………

all these deaths and nobody can see the bigger picture? – once you open your eyes from your long slumber they try their best to deal with you- Flint, MI has a water crisis, but they keep pumping this bullshit on the news about their man made terrorist ISIS-  once you become aware of what is owed to you they get upset and try to silence you- you think out of the blue all these celebrities are just dying? – hell no they were trying to tell you something but never got a chance to so now its R.I.P. shirts and reports of drugs that they were trying! – so now everybody is overdosing nobody wants to live?- that makes no sense when they were happy in their lives and had charitable donations to give – one thing AMERIKKA hates is an educated black man- you mean to tell me yall still pumping that lie about how Christopher Columbus found this land? – He was a thief, a robber, a rapist and those are just to name a few! – but to my understanding if someone was already here that means they introduced YOU! – Trump running for President with no background in politics at all! -so why tell kids to go to college if this multiple divorcee, bankrupt filing , different babymama having, bigot can have it all??-  you mean to tell me the U.S. still recognizes MLK day but won’t tell you the real reason why THEY killed him on that day? you mean to tell me that the day Pac got shot his homeboy Kadafi was killed the very next day?- yeah nobody knew that did they? – he saw what happen, he saw the man that killed Pac- so to silence him they went to his house the very next morning and let off a few shots! – Michael Jackson bought his Masters from Sony and Prince bought himself out also, but you mean to tell me that MJ died from an overdose of propofol? – if he was in a comma how can he inject it in himself? – white folk get pissed off when you go into business for yourself! – we were meant to be enslaved, meant not to have shit, meant to be a waste of space that’s why they get so mad when we build our own shit- but guess whose fault it is? – if you would have left our ancestors be and not bring them over here and make them work hard then maybe everything that  you touch wouldn’t have been created by a MF that resembles ME! – you mean to tell me racist ass Hillary Clinton who lives off of the black vote wants to be in office and yall think she mean half of the bullshit she talking? nah she need your vote so her and Trump can run black folks out of here! – mark my words if either one of them gets elected its bye bye Jews, Niggas, and Spics next year!  Wake up and see what they are doing to us! – they give us social media and a few rights here and there, but now they are comparing the LGBT struggle to the Civil Rights Movement and these MF’s are believing it- Last time I checked a rainbow and the way their guns blow don’t even compare, but I’m going to sit this right here and let you do what you will- But don’t be surprised when they continue to kill black men and women because our facial features fit the bill!

Brittany “BossLady” Johnson

I’m Out…………

A year in the game and nigga I blessed you- gave you a place to stay- you lay your head where I kiss you- a year, 365 days, 52 weeks and you still ain’t sh*t- so therefore here is my good-bye because in a few weeks you will have to find another dumb bi*ch- I got kids to feed and a future to think about- I cant be with a nigga who don’t know that his clock is about to run out- aint sh*t- can’t provide- what kind of man are you?- but I see your plan you too busy waiting on somebody to die so their funds can take care of you- I got boys no need for me to raise somebody else’s son-  that heffa aint do her job because if she did I wouldn’t feel like Jay and Bey- pack my ish up and be on the run- what kind of man disrespects the woman that takes care of him?- I tell you what- the last time was the last time you called me out my name- keep playing and Imma call Pookie and nem’- I’m too old for this and too tired for these games- you better sleep with one eye open and wear a vest because I got good aim! – I’m trying to humble myself and make sure I don’t flip out in front of my kids -but now I see why Left Eye took matches and burned down that nigga crib- I see why bi*ches be on snapped and say they felt like that MF couldn’t or shouldn’t live! – what do you do for me? – what have you done for me?- I tell you what you have done- you wasted a year of my time and I could’ve been with someone else and not Jordi! – yeah I said it Jordi just like Bozo that MF was a clown too- but its all good I hope you remember and enjoyed the last time because nigga I will never spread my legs for you! – why let a bum bend me over? – when all I can say to you now is look at my index and middle fingers DEUCES this shit is over! – hell I’m glad I didn’t have your son or daughter because I would’ve been taking care of them too Lord knows you wouldn’t be able to afford it! – I’m tired of having thoughts of taking you out of the game because where would that leave me and my kids? – and I would be the only one to blame- this is the best pu$$y you have ever had – head game official- sometimes I cry when all I should be doing right now is laughing- should I burn your crib up? – hell no because that belong to me too! – I wish your mom could go back and rethink not aborting you- I’m out I’m leaving taking my a$$ to the N.O. hell those should of been the 2 letters I used when I met you- HELL to the NO!- give my kids something they can build on- help build me and then find a real man that I can really depend on – we cool for the moment because my misery is almost a wrap- but I guess you can go back to your mom house and sleep on her couch like an 8 year old taking a nap – that’s who wants you and that’s who can have your sorry a$$- I made plans, stuck to them, and now I’m out- never to return or to see you again – I hope you got gas money because I cant help you move your sh*t- and don’t ask me can we go half on sh*t- the same way you came to me is the same way you will leave bit*h- I hope you don’t think I’m hurt- please remember this I never needed you MF you needed ME so don’t hit me with the sob story and ask why I am leaving! You good, I’m out, and no we can not even be friends- get your sh*t together and maybe the next woman you meet won’t have these same thoughts because she may not be as nice- so for these next few weeks get it in your mind you will be sleeping alone at night!

Brittany ” BossLady” Johnson

Just Being Me!

you shouldn’t write about that- why is everything so deep and dark- why can’t you write about something more uplifting- to answer all of those questions I can sum it up for you in a nut shell- you see when God made me – HE made me different than the rest- never the one to bite my tongue- and I believe HE sent me to put bs to rest- life is not a fairy tale -and I don’t know about you but puppies and clouds aren’t always the answer- HE sent me here to let you know that life can force you to make decisions that will allow you to divide, destroy and conquer- divide meaning separate- separate from negativity – destroy all aspects about you that were set out to harm due to envy- conquer what is yours and continue on that path- I write about life and sometimes I may shoot something your way  just to make you laugh- we all have different talents- some more useful than others- but what you can and will not do is tell me how to use something that may speak to a young sister or brother-  my writing is my life and sometimes I get inspired by others- sometimes I may take a page out of Pac’s book and destroy an enemy verbally and  sometimes that will suffice so that I will not have to lay my hands on another- this is me- this is who I am- this is what HE decided to give to me- don’t knock something that you don’t understand-why not sit down and get to know me- my gift and my talent is different and so are talents that run through every girl, boy, woman and man- I am different, but there is someone out there just like me – someone who use to be shy but life tossed them a curve ball so they said phuck it and let me give them a show since they all discuss me- let me keep my actions on a college rule before they come and indict me- let me sing about my pain through paper because there may be somebody else out there struggling just like me- but unlike many I never fold, I never cower, and most of all I will continue to do my part and that’s be nobody else but Boss Lady and nobody else holds that title better than  me………………………………….

 

Brittany “BossLady” Johnson